"enlightenment"

it just hit me tonight that 2009 will probably go down as one of those years that i've kind of grown up. i won't go into too much detail, but this has been the year where my outlook has evolved in a lot of things.

i've become less "bitter" and more accepting about (and not merely resigned to) some things that i could not change.

i've learned to distinguish when to keep working on something ["it's worth it"] and when to let it take its course and not force the issue ["it's not worth it"] (less eager to please! less "drama"!).

i've learned to recognize slight changes in my mood and attribute that change to the right trigger/catalyst.

i've gotten less defensive on sensitive subjects [mostly because i have identified what my sensitive subjects are], which helped in handling touchy situations more effectively.

i've learned to embrace change more gracefully, rather than resist it, delay it or be in denial about it.

even my BS radar has improved by leaps and bounds, just because i don't let myself get in the way of how i perceive things around me anymore, or at least not as much as i used to.

in general, i feel like i'm more "at peace" and that i have acquired a little more of that "happy balance" that i aim/wish for.

i still over-analyze and over-think petty (and not-so-petty) stuff and there are still some things that are lacking in so many ways, but it's nice to know that i learned a thing or two over the past few years.

let's see na lang how it goes after i have a few more years in me =)